a soliloquy /səˈlɪləkwi/

2008-11-19T05:22:00.000-07:00

after more than a year long hiatus...

i'm back!

you're my angel

2007-03-13T00:14:00.000-06:00

waiting on an angel
one to carry me home
hope you come to see me soon
cause I don't want to go alone
i don't want to go alone

now angel won't you come by me
angel hear my plea
take my hand lift me up
so that I can fly with thee
so that I can fly with thee

and I'm waiting on an angel
and I know it wont be long
to find myself a resting place
in my angel's arms
in my angel's arms

so speak kind to a stranger
cause you'll never know
it just might be an angel come
knocking at your door
knocking at your door

and I'm waiting on an angel
and I know it wont be long
to find myself a resting place
in my angel's arms
in my angel's arms

waiting on an angel
one to carry me home
hope you come to see me soon
cause I don't want to go alone
I don't want to go alone
don't want to go

I don't want to go alone
...
ben harper

classic rock tuesday night

2007-03-06T21:49:00.000-07:00

tonight i stayed at home and listened to classic rock ballads. my room mate and his girlfriend mentioned that i need a girl. do i? i already have a girl, just that she's in oakland right now serving a mission.

it was really good music. if you want to give classic rock a try, i suggest bread. soppy love songs of the classic era sure beats soppy pop love songs of the 90s and 2000s? (is that the way to say it--2000s?, oh well)

recommendations:

bread - i would give everything i own, if, i wanna make it with you (not in the disgusting sense you pervert), aubrey

...give it a shot, you'll enjoy it

9 months

2007-02-26T21:56:00.000-07:00

has it really been this long?

2006-05-21T00:19:00.000-06:00

不要停止,你們的堅忍和忍耐,應當加倍...

2006-05-18T14:14:00.000-06:00

you know that place between sleeping and dreaming, that's where i'm waiting...

how many teeth are in a horse's mouth?

2006-05-12T21:21:00.000-06:00

ladies and gentlemen, hold your breath and brace yourself for the suave, heartbreaker... mr francis bacon:

well, here's an interesting story i read in my history of psychology textbook, written by the man above:

"in the year of our lord 1432, there arose a grievous quarrel among the brethren over the number of teeth in the mouth of a horse. for 13 days the disputation raged without ceasing. all the ancient books and chronicles were fetched out, and a wonderful and ponderous erudition, such as was never heard of in this region, was made manifest. at the beginning of the 14th day, a youthful friar of goodly bearing asked his learned superiors for a permission to add a word, and straightway, to the wonderment of the disputants, whose deep wisdom he sore vexed, he beseeched them to unbend in a manner coarse and unheard-of, and to look in the open mouth of a horse and find the answer to their questionings. at this, their dignity being grievously hurt, they waxed exceedingly wroth and joining in a mighty uproar, they flew upon him and smote his hip and thigh, and cast him out forthwith. for, said they, surely satan had tempted this bold neophyte to declare unholy and unheard-of ways of finding truth contrary to all the teachings of the fathers. after many days of grievous strife the dove of peace sat on the assembly, and they as one man, declaring the problem to be an everlasting mystery because of a grievous dearth of historical and theological evidence thereof, so ordered the same writ down."

so much for philosophical wisdom!

2006-04-25T23:53:00.000-06:00

semester done.

2006-04-16T08:25:00.000-06:00

consider the lilies of the field, how they grow;
they toil not, neither do they spin:
and yet i say unto you,
that even solomon in all his glory
was not arrayed like one of these.
wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field,
which today is, and tomorrow is cast into the oven,
shall he not much more clothe you,
o ye of little faith?
- Matthew 6:28-30

與我同住

2006-04-12T00:52:00.000-06:00

夕陽西沉，求主與我同住；
黑暗漸深，求主與我同住!
求助無門，安慰也無求處；
常助孤苦之神，與我同住!

渺小浮生，飄向生涯盡處；
歡娛好景，轉瞬都成往事；
變化無常，環境何能留住；
懇求不變之神，與我同住!

我深需主，時刻需主眷顧；
若非主恩，怎將試探抗拒?
誰能如主，時常導引扶持；
無論風雨晦明，與我同住!

...abide with me!

the master carver

2006-04-08T08:46:00.000-06:00

how slow the forming...
how hard the blows...
but i, the stone, must come to know
in my own person, my own soul,
thy will, thy purpose here below.
o master, now i plead to thee,
cut off my roughness, form my face,
refine my feelings, make of me
a fit reflection of thy grace.
yea, haste the day when i may kneel
before thee and great elohim.
accepted, peaceful in thy home,
at last like thee, each grain of stone.
-j. devn cornish

is there no other way?

"Lest We Forget" - Rudyard Kipling

2006-04-03T17:26:00.000-06:00

i know i have been complaining a lot lately.
i know i have no reason to.

general conference was amazing. my first time in the conference center, my first time listening to the prophet speak at conference, my first time interpreting for the world, my first time hearing the grand mormon tabernacle choir.. and the spoken word reads:

When all is well and life is good, we tend to forget those who have made our present comforts possible: the teachers, parents, ancestors, and others who've sacrificed in our behalf. We drive on roads we didn't build, or we eat food we didn't grow—we all enjoy benefits and blessing that have come from the work of others. How often do we pause to acknowledge this? Do we sometimes enjoy the peace without remembering the peacemakers? Do we seize opportunities without giving thought to those who provided them?

We appreciate our blessings more deeply when we choose to remember those who have made these blessings possible. How fully can we appreciate a beautiful performance of music without considering the hours, even years, of practice behind it? How sincerely can we enjoy the gifts of nature—the starlit skies, the flowering fields, the panoramic sunsets—without remembering the God of creation?

Before the children of Israel entered the promised land, Moses reviewed with them the laws and blessings they had been given while in the wilderness. He understood that their prosperity in the land would only be as good as their memory of how they got there: the guidance they received, the lessons they learned, the daily sustenance they were given. Moses counseled, "Take heed to thyself, and keep thy soul diligently, lest thou forget the things which thine eyes have seen, and lest they depart from thy heart all the days of thy life."

If the Giver of all good is always close to our hearts, our lives will be enriched by the reverent memory and acknowledgment of our every blessing.

the mandarin interpretation booth

the salt lake temple... with a little of the conference center poking out at the background

Helping Hand

2006-03-30T23:48:00.000-07:00

picking up life where u left off, or from the pieces on the ground isn't as easy as it sounds.

it involves concentrated effort and focus, things which i obviously lack. sometimes, all you need is someone to reach out a hand to you- so u can grab it, and together with that friend, hoist yourself back onto your feet again, then you can continue your upward climb.

i bought a franklin covey planner today, cost a bomb, an atomic bomb. the rational: i need a new sense of motivation to sort my life out again, to assemble the broken pieces and puzzle them together into a coherent picture.

repentance is such a refreshing principle, don't we all need it ever so badly?

oh let's go back to the start

2006-03-28T14:43:00.000-07:00

come up to meet ya, tell you I'm sorry
you don't know how lovely you are
i had to find you, tell you I need ya
and tell you I set you apart
tell me your secrets, and nurse me your questions
oh lets go back to the start
running in circles, coming in tails
heads on a science apart

nobody said it was easy
it's such a shame for us to part
nobody said it was easy
no one ever said it would be this hard
oh take me back to the start

i was just guessing at numbers and figures
pulling the puzzles apart
questions of science, science and progress
do not speak as loud as my heart
and tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
oh and I rush to the start
running in circles, chasing tails
coming back as we are

coldplay - the scientist

Wishful Thinking

2006-03-28T14:38:00.000-07:00

how shall i...
stand by you but let you go
hear your cry but stay my hand
share my pain but keep my sorrows
love your soul but not your heart

Beaten Down

2006-03-28T14:23:00.000-07:00

a little red ant walks up the hill
a noble task he thinks and feels
getting tired but on he trods
wishing he had encouraging nods
... ... ...
the rain came down and washed him out
the little red ant continues him to go up

i tried to write a poem, but guess i'm not that talented. trying to personify myself as a little red ant climbing a hill is indeed an uphill task. maybe i should just speak plainly.

do you ever feel beaten down?

2006-01-16T16:48:00.000-07:00

so here i am, finally, in cougar-town. is has been wonderful thus far, in fact i'm in the library right now, taking a break from reading all my textbooks. school's been fun except for the absurdly amount of readings that i have. other than that, this has been a dream come true.

the past week or so has been filled with meeting people and adjusting to this new life that i have embarked upon. it's really quite exciting and the opportunities ahead of me are endless.

america... the land of opportunity... and ignorance of the rest of the world.

Gifts of Christmas

2005-12-25T07:30:00.000-07:00

before anything else... merry christmas!

during the christmas period, i noticed a startling phenomenon. as i walked around town, everyone was rushing to buy gifts. what's wrong with that u might ask - nothing at all - however the rush caused a lot of thoughtless gifts to be bought. Gifts that appears perfect and a great buy might seem so only for 1 day. well, this is a continual problem each christmas and lest we lose the real meaning of christmas through mindless gift exchanging, let's review how this tradition of giving came about.

"Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem, Saying, Where is he that is born King of the Jews? for we have seen his star in the east, and are come to worship him. And he sent them to Bethlehem and said, Go and search diligently for the young child; and when ye have found him, bring me word again, that i may come and worship him also. When they had heard the king, they departed; and lo, the star, which they saw in the east, and went before them, till it came and stood over where the young child was. When they saw the star, they rejoiced with exceedingly great joy. And when they were come into the house, they saw the young child with Mary his mother, and fell down, and worshipped him: and when they had opened their treasures, they presented unto him gifts; gold, frankincense, and myrrh."

christmas is about jesus christ, it really is. so the wisemen presented baby jesus with gifts - gold, frankincense and myrrh. these gifts are absolutely befitting for the saviour.

gold proves the providence of god. soon after the wisemen left, joseph was commanded by an angel to escape to egypt, away from the hypocritical king herod who sought the blood of christ. without the gold, they would not make the journey to egypt.

frankincense undertoned king of the jews. a precious and valuable substance used as incense and ointment. jewish kings and royalty anoint their first born with frankincense in a ceremony much like the ordination of a crown prince. the wisemen fulfilled the prophecy that christ will be born king of the jews.

myrrh portended christ's mortal mission. another precious and valuable substance, this time interestingly used to embalm the bodies of royalty and nobility. christ's death was being gravely prophecied as this gift was being presented to him, in no disrespect however, only in reverence of this divine act of love - the atonement.

gold, frankincense, and myrrh - gifts of stark justaposition to that of the commercial today. so what are we giving for christmas to our loved ones this year? and more importantly, what gifts are we presenting to our saviour, him whose birth we celebrate with sparkles and revelry?

2005-12-20T09:07:00.000-07:00

1 more week in singapore...

2005-12-16T08:55:00.000-07:00

yesterday marked the end of a phase of my life back in singapore. for the past 3 months or so i was working at the learning lab. it was time well spent i would say, considering how i was kept busy and how much money i was able to earn to facilitate my pursuit for education.

the learning lab is an interesting place. dominated by female staff, i found myself in an environment where secrets are kept secrets for about 10mins. in fact, if you were to tell someone: "i'm going to tell you something that you cannot tell anyone...", that speeds things up to about 2 mins for the world to know.

nonetheless, i enjoyed working there. i got to work with people, albeit some rather nasty, and felt that i helped, more than i needed help. i did meet some cool and funky people whom are great colleagues as well as friends. i believe i will miss it and will look to it as a chapter of my life that has to be closed.

2005-12-14T08:50:00.000-07:00

presenting... my new toy!

this is my new ibm thinkpad. well it's not quite new considering that is actually 2nd hand. i've been spending some quality time with my new pal, configuring it to just the way i like it... just the way i groove.

this baby in fact symbolizes a lot of sacrifice - sacrifice made by my dear dear family. they actually gave in to my whims and made this purchase possible. it was a great deal nonetheless, being only S$900, as compared to S$2,000+ if i were to get a brand new one! so i guess we couldn't pass on this offer.

so from now on... blogging will be via the new guy!

2005-12-12T06:11:00.000-07:00

don't you simply love christmas?

2005-12-12T05:36:00.000-07:00

alright... i give up. many people have hounded me to come up with a blog ever since my return from my mission. like most things babylon, i resisted. my resistance wore thin and here i am, writing my first ever blog. *applause for my many instigators*

in retrospect, back in the year 2003, i had something similar to a blog, only back then it was called something else. i posted up some comments and movie reviews and such. i seek to incorporate some of the stuff i had back then, however that was a free design platform while this is more templated. so i guess creativity is left to be expressed in words more than visuals here.

hmm... i can't help but feel ever so egoistic as i start this blogging escapade.